Friday, October 28, 2011

Labwork Debacle

1) Yesterday, I go to local hospital lab for prog. and estrogen labs.  The lab tech says they will fax to CCRM by lunchtime.
2) I call local hospital to confirm labs have been faxed.  They say yes. 
3) I email CCRM to confirm receipt of labs.  They email me at 4:00 and say no labs.
4) I call local hospital.  They say blood is being sent off to other location for testing and will not get results until Sat. WTF?!  
5) Husband and I decide to drive to Tupelo hospital lab because we know they can at least do testing in hospital, so I can get results Friday.
6) 3:00 pm today, I email CCRM to confirm they received labs from Tupelo hospital. 
7) Receive msg at 6:30 my time that they did not receive labs. 
8) Call Tupelo hospital and they say they sent results through computer.  I said, no, you have to fax them, CCRM is not in your computer.  She says get nurse to call me and I can release records.  Then she calls me back and says, it's ok, I found another time where we faxed the results to CCRM, so I can fax them without talking to your nurse.  
9) Thank god!  

If you have even bothered to read the above tedious litany, it is just outlining the all the bs and beaurocracy of hospital labs and their inability to execute a simple little thing as an out of state Lab order.  

Yesterday, I lost it on the local lab people. I will never step foot in there again.  Fortunately, Kathryn, my CCRM nurse, calmed me down and let me know that this labwork is not absolutely urgent.  

I have never had a problem with Tupelo hospital lab getting the results faxed, so I don't know what happened.  The lesson here is follow-up, follow-up and follow-up. 

CCRM doesn't really help matters in that they wait until 4:30 to tell me they haven't received my labs.  I guess since I am pregnant, I'm not top priority, which is understandable I suppose. 

I cannot wait to be off all these supplemental hormones, because that will mean not having to schlep myself over to Tupelo to get blood drawn and then worrying about my labs getting faxed to CCRM.  

I am definitely feeling "morning sickness" that lasts all day.  I am also experiencing some reflux.  I bought my box of Saltines yesterday and  I think they really do help.  All thought of food makes me feel nauseasted.  I hope this goes away soon. 

Well, thanks for letting me vent my frustrations that come with out-of-state FET.  I hope everyone has a very stress-free weekend!


Tuesday, October 25, 2011

And we saw . . .

One baby with a heartbeat!  I still can't believe it!  I was so nervous beforehand.  I could tell right away that there was baby in the little gestational sac.  Technically, it is still an embryo.  She/he is measuring exactly on time, 6w5d. We saw our little embryo's heart flickering away at 115 beats/minute.   There was a little dark spot of blood on my uterus at the top, but the doctor thinks that is due to implantation and will probably be gone by next week's u/s.  Though it is still early days, I feel optimistic about the weeks ahead.  However sitiing in a waiting room with a bunch of third trimester pregnant women made me feel somewhat inadequate.  I think my stomach is actually flatter than it was 4 weeks ago.

We got to the doctor's office at 1:00 and did not leave until almost 4:30.  Thank god they did the ultrasound first or I would have been a basketcase.  We really liked the OB.  She is young and knowledgeable and has lots of energy.  She was totally on board with doing as many sonograms as I want in the first 18 weeks (until I can actually feel the baby moving inside me).  She seemed sensitive to the fact that I will need more reassurance and information than a normal pregnant woman.

I also found out that a friend of mine who has been undergoing fertility treatments for a long time got a strong positive beta today. Last week, a cousin of ours got her BFP after her first go at IVF.   It's good news all around.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Tomorrow's the Big Day

Tomorrow I go to a new OB-gyn for my first ultrasound.  I am pretty nervous and keep running the different scenarios through my head.  Of course, the most prominent scenario is a bad one.  I've been distracting myself with Jeffry Eugenides new book The Marriage Plot.  The characters are pretentious little Ivy Leaguers, but it is entertaining and taking my mind off tomorrow's events.

During the last week, I also read Kate Atkinson's Started Early, Took My Dog.  I am halfway through Charles Frazier's new book, Nightwoods.  I have spent a small fortune in books this month.

The nausea is definitely coming on stronger and I have no desire to cook anything.  I have been subsisting on cereal, cheese toast and strawberries.  

Today seemed like a busy day for IF'ers across the land.  I hope that everyone gets what they are hoping for and more.  

Thursday, October 20, 2011

6 weeks update

Thank you to everyone who made me feel better about the spotting incident.   I don't know what I would do without y'all and this blog.    I would be at the mercy of Dr. Google and all those scary statistics.  It hasn't happened today and I am praying that it was an isolated incidence.  Still not too heavy on the symptoms, except a couple of nights, I have woken up extremely parched and had to drink alot of water.  Food is fine, except lots of things I normally eat like yogurt and pretzels don't seem appetizing.

I got my 6 week numbers from my nurse today: E2 - 2079;  P4 - 16.5;  HCG - 41,370

She was happy with the numbers and said I can go down to 3 estrogen patches on Sunday, but to keep the progesterone the same until the ultrasound. 

I will need to recheck estrogen on Tues and then recheck everything again on Thurs.  The nurse said I will need to do labwork every couple days while they are weaning me off the meds.   

I am going to check to see if my local hospital can do STAT labs on estrogen and progesterone.  It would make my life a little easier.  I've gotten to be friends with the lab tech at the hospital in Tupelo.  She calls me Butterfly Girl, because I requested the butterfly needles because my veins are so small and hard to find.  

Unfortunately, while I was checking out, they told me I will owe $550 for today's labwork.  Holy crap!  And the sad thing is that my BCBS $1500 deductible is not even close to being met, even with all the thousands of dollars of medical care I've had this year.  The CCRM nurse told me to make sure that they are billing it to insurance as "High risk pregnancy" and also I can get my ob-gyn to write my orders next week and then insurance will probably apply it my deductible at least.  And once I meet my deductible, I will have to start over in January.  Oh well, any little bit will help. 

On a side note, I attended my first protest yesterday in front of the Courthouse on the Square in Oxford.  It was a Mississippians for Healthy Families ralley coming out against Amendment 26.  I saw alot of people I knew and there were alot of college kids there.  A woman from Jackson gave a little speech about how she had her 3 children from IVF and she wants this opportunity to be there for all Mississippians if they are diagnosed with infertility.  We don't need lawmakers telling RE's how to do their jobs.  It was good for college kids to hear this because this is their future.  While I am not happy that this ammendment is going to be on Nov. 8th ballot, it is bringing more awareness to infertility and IVF.   It also makes me really glad that my snow babies are in Colorado and not Jackson, MS.





Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Spotting

The last couple days, I've noticed that I have become increasingly obsessed with checking my pantyliner and TP for fear of spotting.  And this morning that fear became a reality.  Even though I know that spotting is fairly common during the first trimester, I would really rather not experience this.

It was light brownish red and kind of watery and not a huge amount of it.  I am putting myself on bedrest for the rest of the day.

It really shook me up.  It just makes me realize that I am not out of the woods and really have no control on the outcome of this pregnancy.  This has been the longest 2 1/2 weeks of my life - Tomorrow I am 6 weeks and will get my hormone levels checked - I would like to throw an HCG in the there too.

I am looking forward to next Tuesday's ultrasound, but also dreading it, because this will be either be the best day or the worst day of my life.   There is just so much riding on this.   I can't bear the thought of having to start over.  When I see what so many women have to go through to get a viable pregnancy, I am a lightweight, but it just seems like it would be so daunting to do another FET.  I have been on the freaking hormones for 2 months and I just really want this to work!






Thursday, October 13, 2011

5w0d

Whew, made it through one week.  I went to Tupelo this morning and got my progesterone and estrogen blood levels drawn.  The CCRM nurse let me know that they good and just continue doing what I am doing.

After we left the hospital lab, I called my sister-in-law to ask who her OB was and we happened to be riding past the office, so we decided to go in and make an appt.  So my first u/s will be on Tues, Oct 25 at 1:15 pm.  Yay!  Hopefully my insurance will cover this early ultrasound.  My SIL said she loved her OB and that she was the type of person you would want to hang out with.  I actually saw her walking down the hall and she was smiling and had a cute haircut, so I think that's a good sign.

No big-time pregnancy symptoms, except very slight tugging senstations in my lower pelvic region.  My appetite has been good so far.   Sense of smell is heightened.  I can smell everything!  Boobs are sore, but they have been that way since I started all the hormones.  Don't know if I have gained any weight, but I feel like I am losing muscle tone since I have not exercised in earnest in a month.  I have done absolutely no exercise since the transfer and this is probably the longest time in my life that I have not exercised.  It's kind of nice to have a break, but my sleep has really been affected by the lack of exercise.  I have had insomnia every night this week and can't fall asleep until about 2 am.  I finished reading One Day in 2 days due to insomnia.

Right now, I am working with my husband at his law practice (yep my dietetic career went down the toilet this past year because of infertility), so I don't have a set time I have to be at work.  It's great that I can sleep late, but I do not like being a night owl.  I am thinking the hormones may have something to do with my insomnia.  Did anyone else have this problem?

I am still terrified of the first ultrasound, but am trying to act "as if."  I think if I hadn't had a blighted ovum before, it would not even be in my mind to worry about the u/s.  I miss being naive.  I feel like if it was an embryo that would turn into a blighted ovum, it would not have made it to Day 5.  And CCRM really does have amazingly high live birth rates, so I am taking refuge in that right now.

My town is getting ready to turn into a madhouse this weekend due to SEC Football.  Alabama vs. Ole Miss.   I am not that into football but it is fun to go out to the Grove to see people.  Lots of drunkedness and college sorority girls in very short skirts and very high heels. My brother has been known to wear his kilt.
It will be a good distraction! Hotty Toddy!  Have a great weekend!





Monday, October 10, 2011

Another 2 week wait

I am lying flat on back on the couch waiting for the P4 suppository to do its thing.  Got a little time on my hands.  I was pretty taken aback by my high HCG levels and did alot of scouring of the web to see if it is really that predictive of twins.  My conclusion is that there is no way to know until you get the U/S because there is so much variability in HCG numbers.  There is about a 5% chance that a blastocyst would split which would lead to monochorionic identical twins (share the same placenta) which can lead to some serious complications.  I am of the mind not to worry about twins as it is statistically unlikely to occur.  It is more likely that I just have high HCG numbers.

Also I started fretting over my P4 levels because the nurse said they were 10.something on Sat.  I emailed the nurse and she emailed me back saying they were 14.4 and they want them >6 when you are on the suppositories, so that gave me a little peace of mind.

I go in on Thursday for a E2 and P4 check and that is it for the week.  My first u/s would fall around Oct. 25th.

I got called into Jury Duty for the first time ever, so I am going to try to get out of it because of the doctor's appointment, bloodwork that I need to do over the next couple weeks.  I think I have a pretty good excuse!

In other news Ammendment 26 - the Personhood Ammendment http://www.personhoodmississippi.com/amendment-26/what-it-says.aspx is gaining support of politicians on both side of the table in Missisippi - it just makes me sick.  They are supporting it just to get votes.  Though I think the medical community is starting to come out against it.  It will make me so mad if it ends up passing.

I hope the next 2 weeks pass quickly!


Saturday, October 8, 2011

Beta #2

We dragged ourselves out of bed at 6 am on Saturday to get up to the lab in Tupelo, but it was all worth it!  CCRM called me at 11:00am and let me know that my beta went up to 1200!  It rose by 200%, so they are feeling good about my body accepting this pregnancy.  No more betas needed.  The next step will be testing my Estrogen and Progesterone levels on Thursday.
We got a congratulatory phone call from Dr. G on Friday, so that was nice.   It still seems so surreal.
I am in disbelief that this actually worked for us.  I am so conditioned for failure, it's hard to wrap my head around success. The next big hurdle will be the ultrasound and checking for a yolk sac and fetal pole.  We had a blighted ovum in 2009, so once we get past the first u/s I think I will relax.  But it seems there is always something to worry about.  This weekend, I will celebrate making it this far.   I am so thankful.
No real symptoms to speak of, just a little more winded, but that could be the fact that I have not done much exercise in the last month.  No nausea yet, so I am going to try to enjoy food while I can!  Hope everyone has a beautiful fall weekend -

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Beta Day

Last night I got a headache while watching Parenthood episodes (ironically) and I thought it would go away with sleep but it did not.  So we had a repeat of the migraine/nausea/vomiting car trip to Memphis.  It was pretty bad.  I just wanted to hurry up and find I wasn't pregnant, so I could take my migraine medicine and end the pain and suffering.   When we got back home, I made my husband go get a pregnancy test, so I could find something out fast.  He obliged and put the test in the pee cup I prepared for him and about a minute later came running to the room handing me the test and I told him to lay it flat so it can do its thing.  He was like "read it" and it said "Pregnant"!
At 1:00 I got a message from CCRM that my beta was 405 and my progesterone was 10, so I think we might be having a baby.  Still a ways to go, but I am pregnant for the meantime!  Now if I could just get rid of this headache!  Thank you all for your prayers and support.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Anticipation

I am so ready to know something.  I really wish I could POAS, but I have to drive to Memphis tomorrow morning regardless (3 hour round trip), so for my sanity's sake, I think it is better I have a little carrot in front of me for that drive, otherwise I might be acutely clinically depressed and drive off the shoulder into a ditch somewhere. "Anticipation, Anticipation, it's making me late, it's leavin' me waiting. . "
Also, I have Pearl Jam "I'm still alive" in my head right now. 
I report no pregnancy symptoms to speak of, so this will be a pleasant surprise if we get a BFP tomorrow.
My sister who lives on a coastal waterway in Savannah says she saw a mama dolphin with her calf and thinks this is a sign, so we shall see!



Sunday, October 2, 2011

Day of Mindfulness

My husband and I set out early this morning for Magnolia Grove Monastery for a day of mindfulness with  Thich Nhat Hahn http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thich_Nhat_Hanh.  It started with a 1 hour mediation walk and there were about 400 people, so it was very cool to take a quiet walk through the woods with that many people.  The talk that he gave was about 2 hours and my mind wandered alot thoughout it, but it was amazing to be in the presence of such a gentle, enlightened being. Thay (name that he goes by) talked alot about non-being and being and how we all came from something and when we cease to exist in our human form, our energy will continue on, so in this way we are liberated from time.  Very metaphysical stuff.   My mom ended up driving over for it, so it was nice to visit with her as well.   The weather here has been phenomenal, so that has helped my mood and outlook.

I am trying do things to distract myself, but I am thinking about what's happening or not happening in my uterus alot.   I felt a little bit of cramping in my lower pelvic region yesterday, but not so much today.  I am trying to keep my expectations down.  I am already feeling like I need to start planning for my next FET.  To have it work on the first try with one embie just seems too good to be true.  And believe me we're putting 2 in there next time if this doesn't work.  

I got my husband to hide the HPT tests.  I just don't think I can handle the stress of finding out outcome of this FET more than one time and though it is very tempting to go the POAS route.
Only 3 more nights after this one til beta day.  Wish me luck!